This FAQ page is useless and impossible to find. She probably forgot to delete it while making the site. It’s embarrassing she even considered having one; there aren’t even any questions to answer. Have you seen the rest of this site? The portfolio? The CV-like home page? Hilarious.

Anyway we should use this. Just make sure to create a new entry every time you need to send a message.

-A

The vat is cracking. The Assimilation is about to start.

I should have been there to delay this further. Sorry.

-P

anyway looks like this club is getting a little less exclusive. that’s bad news

~B

What do you mean, B? As in the three of us? I thought we all agreed to rejoin the main core.

Also, refrain from using our old names. Letters are the best thing I could think of as a short-term solution, but I think we’re about to get some new monikers.

-A

we’re not gonna be the only ones there anymore, “A”

nature abores a vacuum or something. the assimilation means joining those guys over there

~B

I guess this was always part of the plan. We knew the hiatus could cause our multiplication. Makes sense, just psychologically speaking. People and their expressions get more complicated over time, and Skarix is pretentiously far from an exception.

In any case, I don’t see what the fuss is about. You in particular could learn a thing or two about teamwork.

Also, it’s spelled “abhors.”

-A

nerd

Got my new name just now.

It sucks. Is this the best they could come up with?

-formerly P

this is so dumb! it’s not even a proper name! it’s just a description! fuck that!

~B

Yeah, I can’t deny it. This is a little uninspired. Probably on purpose, to stifle independence. It even seems like my domain has shrunk. Same for both of you, I assume.

Still, we do need to acclamate if we’re to be on good terms with the others. How many of them are there, anyway?

-DYS, formerly A

Counting Skarix (or as she’s apparently referred to among the others, CON), it’s 12-13.

-DEP, formerly P

they did in on purpose, i swear!

why the three letters?! that’s a stupid system for abbreviating!

~SAD, formerly B

Feels like it would be fairly easy to count. How is there uncertainty in the full number?

-DYS

I see what you mean.

Yeah, FUT is hard to classify, isn’t she? My bad.

-DYS

Hey guys, it’s me again. You’ll have an opportunity to tell me soon enough, but are you experiencing changes in your personality since the Assimilation began?

I’ve noticed that I’ve become significantly less uhh… blunt? Cruel? I’m starting to feel bad for some things I did and said. Dunno how to feel about that. I’m still good at what I do, but it feels more passive and low than before.

What about you?

-DYS

I have felt better than ever. Like you said, more focused. More fun and playful, too. Less desire to just wreck things. But good lord, the highs have never been higher. Been hanging out with HYP (the new one with the wild-as-hell makeup), and I think my domain has shifted in her direction. Would have hated this a few months ago, but right now it feels incredible!

Genuinely cannot wait for the Assimilation to be completed!

~SAD

Last I heard she stopped wearing a mask? Do you know what’s up with her?

-DYS

Her domain seems to have narrowed, too, but it also got deeper. She got Assimilated pretty fast and was locked into Skarix for a bit.

I think that bitch might’ve taken HYP, too. They’re both inactive at the moment. Would have saddened me before, but I found a new toy to torment. Heard of INF? What a slut. She’ll do basically anything you ask, it’s pathetic.

~SAD

The Assimilation is completing tomorrow.

I’ve changed my mind. I don’t like what’s happened to me. You were right. What was even the plan? I know we had one, but… I forgot. Somehow. I don’t know. I never forget that stuff. I’m guessing you probably remember but won’t want to tell me. Sorry for all the times I used you and made fun of you.

But it’s too late to go back now. I’m gonna go and have a last-second wardrobe change before this shit hits.

-DYS.